'After a great weekend of pottering in the garden, I woke up on Monday morning with a stiff arm. By Thursday I felt a lump in my armpit, so I headed off to the doctors, convinced that I must have pulled a muscle. After all, I had heard that cancerous lumps don't hurt. My doctor suggested an ultrasound and also informed me that it was possible that a sample of the lump might need to be taken, a biopsy.

'On Friday I was at the hairdressers at 8.30 am for a quick trim before heading off to work. The phone call came from my doctor: lymphoma had been diagnosed. After seeing the oncologist, stage 2, large, diffuse cell NHL was confirmed, chemotherapy was mentioned and, somewhere in his discussions, was something about radiotherapy. I don't remember much about that day or the next 6 months.

'Chemo and radiotherapy have successfully treated the disease, but it is the emotional journey that no-one prepared me for. Waiting for the next 3-monthly check up, hoping that the disease has not returned, has been really difficult, and not just for me. No-one is game enough to mention the events from last year.

'But here I am a year later, trying to get my life back in some sort of order. I am back at work, although I have to reduce my hours. The journey has left me really tired: I now find that most days I need a "nanna nap" just to help me get through the normal evenings and activities of family life.

'So how do I cope? I try to avoid being alone. I get up every morning and prepare my "happy face" (make up). One day soon I hope to feel like one of the lucky ones.'